Sunday, October 1, 2017

Small things in a great way.


Yesterday was my youngest boy’s birthday and I was missing my MIL. A lot. Because she has always been there for all my kids’ birthdays, always a good sport. I don’t know many people who have the kind of relationship I had with my MIL. She’s always referring me to people as her daughter instead of daughter in law and she makes me feel like I’m one of her own. I transitioned into her family with ease and this will always remind me of the doa I made in front of the kaabah; I prayed for a good spouse and equally good in laws and alhamdulillah, I got them. 

It has been 9 months without her in our lives and although her spirit is still very much around, sometimes I miss her so much I can’t seem to tell others because I wouldn’t think people would believe and/or understand. After all, I am just the daughter in law. But really, it feels like there is an empty hole in my heart. I really miss having her around. It doesn't help that sometimes I feel like I am filling a huge shoes now that she’s gone and I am the only woman  left anchoring the family. How am I supposed to be positive and all that all the time?! I am just me. 

You know how they say if you cannot do great things, then you must do small things in great way. She is a testament to that. A simple person but is awesome in so many ways. The kind of person who would always rise above the condition she is put in, she radiates positivity and calmness even in chaotic and stressful situation. She has been tested in so many ways but she remained the cool and lovable person through it all. Even her final battle against cancer was fought like a goddess, never complaining, almost always in good mood until one day, Allah decided it’s time for her to go somewhere better, more deserving of her. If you know my MIL personally, you would nod in agreement to everything you have read here and you will now be reminded of her beautiful soul. 

I hope I will have enough good deeds so that one day we may meet again in Jannah. I miss you, Mak. A lot. Al-Fatihah.

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